Geckos, and lobsters, and Maddie--Oh my.

This past weekend I escaped the underwear-eating geckos of my apartment and headed South for my mid-year Fulbright seminar in Nha Trang.

That's right. There are underwear-eating geckos in my apartment.

It's a glamorous life.

I wasn't going to write about the miscreant reptiles, believing the subject pushes even my insensitive-to-overshare boundaries. I also didn't want to give the little shits the satisfaction of being blogged about.

Obviously my self-control lost out to my desire to amuse, so here I am, unable to contain myself, giving TMI about the lizards with a thing for my Victoria's Secret collection.

About three weeks ago I did my laundry, only to find upon unloading that some of my underwear was, well, holey. "Weird," I thought. I looked through my washing machine, which doubles as my hamper, for anything that could have wrought such damage upon my unmentionables. At the bottom of the washing machine I found a few loose screws that had been in my jeans pocket from the Habitat project. "Ah," I thought. "They got caught in my underwear during the spin cycle." That's it. Mystery solved. Still weird...but mystery solved.

The next week I did more laundry, and encountered the same problem. Again I looked into the bottom of my washer/hamper, and this time I noticed a bolt that was a little loose. More far fetched than the screws, but I thought it was possible that the bolt was the real culprit.

Meanwhile, the weather had gotten colder in North Vietnam, and the neighborhood geckos had begun to retreat indoors. I had seen only a few in my flat, but their strong presence was verified by the recent increase in gecko-poop, which--although small--is pretty gross.

Finally, a little over a week ago, I went to pull a shirt out of my washer/hamper, and saw that a pair of my underwear was already holey, pre-washing. It took about five seconds to put the holey underwear together with the nearby gecko poop laced with pink lace.

I lost it. There was yelling and cursing and the throwing of pots and pans. It was quite a scene--I just wish someone had seen it. I have since started using a new, sealed laundry bag. I have not been able to get rid of the geckos, and they are still pooping a lot, but at least my underwear is intact.

All of that being said, it's not surprising that I was eager to escape my flat and go to Vietnam's version of paradise: Nha Trang. I spent two days at Nha Trang University for my mid-year seminar, and spent the rest of my time on the beach, in a boat, or with Buddha. It was really beautiful...see pictures. You'll also see a picture of "Why Not Bar"--the closest thing to Bergen County this side of the Hudson.

Oh--and we ate fresh lobsters on the beach.